Run back to God...
Sy Rogers is in town as guest speaker at the youth services this week. He's quite different this time from the last time he came. He seemed alot more masculine this time round. But maybe because he's speaking on more serious topic than the previous time when he was sharing his life testimony. Or maybe it was my own expectations. : ) But anyway, the things he shared are revelations and amazing.
Yesterday during the 4.30pm service, he spoke about how he managed to keep himself 'clean' after so many years, still pursuing God with a deep love. One thing is for sure - You can turn towards God away from your filthy & ungodly lifestyle, but it's another thing to be able to sustain that pure and undefiled life.
So, he was sharing how after he became a Christan, he still suffered from ungodly desires in his heart and felt very tempted to want to go back to his gay lifestyle. And everytime such feelings and thoughts surface, he would feel very dirty and unworthy and helpless. Aftre two years of struggles, he came before God & asked God to show him how to go on living because he was just so tired of it all. And God spoke to him. He told Sy that he did some things wrongly. First of all, he tried to suppress his own feelings and emotions in an attempt to present himself holy and pure to God. Secondly, he fed on those emotions and feelings and dwelt in them, instead of committing it to God.
What Pst Sy said next shook me, and is a true revelation. He said that very often we all try to clear up our own mess and make ourselves right again before coming back to God. Because we want to be good children and not offend God with our dirty nature. So, whenever we think bad thoughts in our minds, or behave badly, we run far away from God, try to settle it ourselves before coming back to God again. How wrong is this kind of thinking?! The fact is, we cannot help ourselves! Instead of running away from God in shame, we should be running towards Him! He is the only one who can help us to really change and become a new person. Don't attempt to clean up your own mess, because our Jesus is not a God who cannot help us. He wants to help us clear up our mess so that we can grow up in Him. So, the first thing to do is to run back to God wherever I am, because I know I will find forgiveness and grace in the Lord.
It's true, isn't it?? The first thing we do when we sin is to run away, alot of times. Because of shame, guilt, embarrassment. It's telling God, "sorry, I fouled up again.. Let me go settle it first before coming back to church, before I serve again..." It sounds so much like a lame excuse now! So, I make a decision now. I will never run away from God ever again. I WANT TO RUN BACK TO GOD!
Yesterday during the 4.30pm service, he spoke about how he managed to keep himself 'clean' after so many years, still pursuing God with a deep love. One thing is for sure - You can turn towards God away from your filthy & ungodly lifestyle, but it's another thing to be able to sustain that pure and undefiled life.
So, he was sharing how after he became a Christan, he still suffered from ungodly desires in his heart and felt very tempted to want to go back to his gay lifestyle. And everytime such feelings and thoughts surface, he would feel very dirty and unworthy and helpless. Aftre two years of struggles, he came before God & asked God to show him how to go on living because he was just so tired of it all. And God spoke to him. He told Sy that he did some things wrongly. First of all, he tried to suppress his own feelings and emotions in an attempt to present himself holy and pure to God. Secondly, he fed on those emotions and feelings and dwelt in them, instead of committing it to God.
What Pst Sy said next shook me, and is a true revelation. He said that very often we all try to clear up our own mess and make ourselves right again before coming back to God. Because we want to be good children and not offend God with our dirty nature. So, whenever we think bad thoughts in our minds, or behave badly, we run far away from God, try to settle it ourselves before coming back to God again. How wrong is this kind of thinking?! The fact is, we cannot help ourselves! Instead of running away from God in shame, we should be running towards Him! He is the only one who can help us to really change and become a new person. Don't attempt to clean up your own mess, because our Jesus is not a God who cannot help us. He wants to help us clear up our mess so that we can grow up in Him. So, the first thing to do is to run back to God wherever I am, because I know I will find forgiveness and grace in the Lord.
It's true, isn't it?? The first thing we do when we sin is to run away, alot of times. Because of shame, guilt, embarrassment. It's telling God, "sorry, I fouled up again.. Let me go settle it first before coming back to church, before I serve again..." It sounds so much like a lame excuse now! So, I make a decision now. I will never run away from God ever again. I WANT TO RUN BACK TO GOD!
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