A Man-Pleaser?
Isaiah told me before that my life is sometimes miserable because I take the opinions of man about me very seriously. I admit that. I am someone who thinks very importantly of how people view me as a person, as a leader, as a friend.. Am I a man-pleaser? I hope not of course, but sometimes the line can be very blur.
I take people's comments seriously. Especially those pertaining to me as a person or my abilities in my work, in my leadership, in my duties as a daughter, wife or mother. So much so that when I learn about negative things that people say about me, I'll get very upset. After the upset phase, I will evaluate myself of course, but I cannot deny that I simply cannot be nonchalant about it.
Isaiah's different from me in this aspect though. He can be in a state where he completely ignores people's opinions of him or how they see him. He has the ability to block out the effect of others' words on him. It's both good & bad, I feel. For one, his moods are never determined by people's words. Yet, I also feel that it can make one self centred & develop a can't-be-bothered attitude, if not careful.
The Word of God tells us not to please man but strive to please God. I know that. Yet, I cannot be someone who totally do not care about the opinions of other people and only care about what God says. I personally think very few people can do that. We often dish out advice to people not to be too bothered about what others say because we live for ourselves, not for anyone else.
Yet the truth is, human beings are not loners. We live in a community and we thrive on each others' prosperity and happiness.
For example, when we hear about the Chinese girl who got cut up into pieces by her lover, it's hard for us to laugh over it as if it's a joke. When we see terror acts happening all over the world and the gruesome pictures of blood spurt everywhere on unidentifiable bodies, can we still smile as if it's just another too-bad-it-happened-to-you incident? I think most of us cannot.
But I think the key here is balance. While it's obviously no good living in the shadow of people's opinions of us and be waivered left & right by them all the time, we need to have some sort of consciousness of who we really are in the eyes of others. Especially in the eyes of people who matter to us. Because only when we hear the hard & painful truth, will we wake up & say that we need to change. Only then will we be jerked from our comfortable seats & realise that there is something we can do better. Isn't that a positive thing?
I do not want to be a man-pleaser. I repeat, I do not want to be a man-pleaser. I just strive to be the best person that I can be, one whom God designed me to be, one whom God believes I can be. And sometimes, I can only measure how well I've done by the feedback of people around me. Or should I expect God to shout down from heaven every now & then just to tell me how well I've done? I wouldn't mind God doing that of course, but let's get real, that doesn't happen all the time.
This is purely my own opinion. You don't have to agree with me. :)
Isaiah told me before that my life is sometimes miserable because I take the opinions of man about me very seriously. I admit that. I am someone who thinks very importantly of how people view me as a person, as a leader, as a friend.. Am I a man-pleaser? I hope not of course, but sometimes the line can be very blur.
I take people's comments seriously. Especially those pertaining to me as a person or my abilities in my work, in my leadership, in my duties as a daughter, wife or mother. So much so that when I learn about negative things that people say about me, I'll get very upset. After the upset phase, I will evaluate myself of course, but I cannot deny that I simply cannot be nonchalant about it.
Isaiah's different from me in this aspect though. He can be in a state where he completely ignores people's opinions of him or how they see him. He has the ability to block out the effect of others' words on him. It's both good & bad, I feel. For one, his moods are never determined by people's words. Yet, I also feel that it can make one self centred & develop a can't-be-bothered attitude, if not careful.
The Word of God tells us not to please man but strive to please God. I know that. Yet, I cannot be someone who totally do not care about the opinions of other people and only care about what God says. I personally think very few people can do that. We often dish out advice to people not to be too bothered about what others say because we live for ourselves, not for anyone else.
Yet the truth is, human beings are not loners. We live in a community and we thrive on each others' prosperity and happiness.
For example, when we hear about the Chinese girl who got cut up into pieces by her lover, it's hard for us to laugh over it as if it's a joke. When we see terror acts happening all over the world and the gruesome pictures of blood spurt everywhere on unidentifiable bodies, can we still smile as if it's just another too-bad-it-happened-to-you incident? I think most of us cannot.
But I think the key here is balance. While it's obviously no good living in the shadow of people's opinions of us and be waivered left & right by them all the time, we need to have some sort of consciousness of who we really are in the eyes of others. Especially in the eyes of people who matter to us. Because only when we hear the hard & painful truth, will we wake up & say that we need to change. Only then will we be jerked from our comfortable seats & realise that there is something we can do better. Isn't that a positive thing?
I do not want to be a man-pleaser. I repeat, I do not want to be a man-pleaser. I just strive to be the best person that I can be, one whom God designed me to be, one whom God believes I can be. And sometimes, I can only measure how well I've done by the feedback of people around me. Or should I expect God to shout down from heaven every now & then just to tell me how well I've done? I wouldn't mind God doing that of course, but let's get real, that doesn't happen all the time.
This is purely my own opinion. You don't have to agree with me. :)
Comments
you're really right about striking a balance. Most importantly, no matter wat negative opinions come our way, we must be strong, evaluate and overcome.
thanks so much for sharing this.